Why am i not happy?
This something that i have only pondered on for a moment. The thing that caused me to come to this point of such an introspective question is simply this. God sees me and my world a certain way. He sees all the things that he intended for man to have in it. Thats everything from spiritual oneness with him and others everything to earthly dominion. The fact is when man sinned he broked that actuality in to a million little peices that has to be re claimed by man.
Im in thw course of doing so i would say. There is yet something lacking. Im not happy, i find myself going to and fro looking for something. Why does it seem like life is not deep enough. I like i want it all to complex. My love for God is complex. For my family and friends is complex. My passion for my craft i want it all to be deep. It doesnt seem deep at all. It seems like the rest of the world shallow and breakable.
The only relationship that i can honestly say is complex is my relationship with God. That is only due to my lack of faithfulness. When i am his door open and open and open. Everyone else seems to be come dim and short.
I guess in retrospect that is how it is suppose to be. That the only person whose relationship is complex is mine and His. i have to put myself in a position to become comfortable with standing alone. I dont FEEL like i should but i know whats better for me at this point. So I guess i will be by myself.
the funnything about all of this is that i have everything i could have ever wanted in life. A girlfriend who wants to be wifey, money on the way, good home life, great prospect of opportunities ahead of me. Yet im not happy........The answer to all this is i know
